Why Are Parents Such an Important Part of Treatment?

One of the most common questions we hear from parents at the beginning of treatment is:

"If my child is the one struggling, why am I spending so much time in therapy?"

It's a fair question. Whether we're meeting with parents on their own, together with their child, or coaching them through interactions, there is a reason we intentionally integrate parents into treatment. Children don't build new skills simply because they come to therapy once a week. They build new skills by practicing them over and over again in their everyday lives. Our role is to help families understand what to practice, why it matters, and how to create opportunities for that practice outside of the therapy office.

Why are parents involved?

Children spend about an hour a week in therapy. The rest of their week is spent at home, at school, with family, and in their community. Those everyday moments are where treatment comes to life. Whether a child is learning to tolerate anxiety, follow directions more consistently, communicate in new situations, manage big emotions, or become more independent, meaningful progress happens through repeated opportunities to practice those skills, not just during a therapy session.

Parents are naturally in the best position to help make those opportunities happen. That doesn't mean parents are expected to become therapists. It means they become an important part of helping children apply what they're learning in the places that matter most.

What does parent involvement actually look like?

The answer depends on your child's goals and the treatment approach. Sometimes our work with parents focuses on understanding their child's challenges, learning evidence-based strategies, planning for difficult situations, and troubleshooting obstacles together. We may review videos of interactions at home, role-play upcoming situations, or adjust strategies as treatment progresses. Other treatments are much more interactive. In Parent-Child Interaction Therapy (PCIT) and PCIT for Selective Mutism (PCIT-SM), for example, we observe parents interacting with their child and provide live coaching in real time. This allows parents to practice new skills with immediate feedback before using them independently at home. While the format may look different, the goal is always the same: helping families feel confident supporting their child between sessions.

Why not just teach my child the skills during therapy?

Imagine a child is learning to ride a bike: You wouldn't expect them to become confident after riding for 50 minutes once a week. They improve by practicing repeatedly in different environments, making mistakes, receiving support, and gradually becoming more independent. Therapy works much the same way.

We use sessions to introduce new skills, practice them together, and identify what will be most helpful for each child. Parents then have countless natural opportunities throughout the week to help those skills become part of everyday life. For one child, that may be practicing flexibility during a morning routine. For another, it may be encouraging independence during homework, helping a child tolerate uncertainty, or creating opportunities to communicate in new situations.
Those moments often have just as much therapeutic value as what happens in our office.

Since every family looks different, not every family needs the same level of parent involvement.
Some parents participate in nearly every session. Others meet with us periodically to learn strategies, problem-solve challenges, or adjust the treatment plan as their child progresses. As children get older, they often spend more time meeting independently with a therapist, while parents continue to play an important role behind the scenes. Treatment should always be individualized to the child, the family's goals, and the approach being used.

Understanding the "why"

One of the things we value most at Growing Minds is helping parents understand the reasoning behind our recommendations. Rather than simply telling families what to do, we want parents to understand why a particular strategy is likely to be helpful, when it should be used, and how it fits into their child's treatment goals. When parents understand the principles behind treatment, they're better equipped to make thoughtful decisions in everyday situations, even the ones we could never anticipate during a therapy session. We want children to be successful for more than one hour each week. Instead, we want them to develop the skills they learn in therapy to become part of their everyday lives and parents play an essential role in making that happen.